THE WALKING DEAD SEASON 8 FINALE

“Wrath” commenced with a throwback scene of Rick and a tiny Karl walking along a road, the same one referred to in ‘the letter’ to his Dad.  Immediately you feel from the off as though you are going have to have your wits about you for this finale episode!

Rick aka piss holes in the sand eyes asks Siddiq to tell him how his son died.  The explanation forthcoming was that he had been paying his respects to a woman he never knew (comforting!). 

Cut to the King and Jerry.  The King as always continues to talk in riddles, whilst Jerry concentrated settling on using the brown word as many times as possible during their exchange whilst setting the scene of things to come.

From the look on Maggie’s face it appeared she maybe suffering from a bad case of indigestion, with a severe shortage of Rennies she continues to looked pained during a discussion about the map brought to them via dodgy Dwight speculating its worth. 

Morgan has another of his funny five mins resulting in him nearly putting his bō (pronounced like “boat,” without the T) in Henrys head.  On the back of this Rick suggests that maybe Morgan should stay home, but Morgan insists he must do what needs to be done.  He shares with Rick they are worse than they have ever been by giving their word and then killing and states ‘let’s just finish this’.

The main characters from Ricks Gang stride meaningfully armed whilst Rick and Michonne are hand in hand joined by a gun.  The build up to the anticlimatic battle has begun. 

Back at the Sanctuary Negan’s Saviors seem to have multiplied in numbers as they all mill about seemingly in a synchronized ‘heigh ho heigh ho, it’s off to war we go’ manner whilst getting ready to leave all gunned up.  Eugene the master bullet maker invites Negan to try out the quality of his work on a stuffed torso of hay clad in a white t-shirt with the name ‘Rick’ splashed across its chest

Eugene’s character apart from the off-putting mullet is another that talks in tongues and constantly mutters, which makes it very difficult at times to make out what he is saying and then you have to decipher what he was saying, by which time the new world has begun and you’re none the wiser!

Back to the plot; Gabriel the priest is being put to good use and brought along with the purpose to listen to Negan’s confessions along the way (good job as if he had written them down it would have taken longer than a car ride!)  Its not long before Negan spills about having to sacrifice some of his people to trap Rick and his pricks (his words not mine).

Negan tells Gabriel that they will find a map which is part of his plan when they kill his men and that he is going to kill Rick and everyone connected; this information is far too much for the ex-priest who decides to take advantage of the car swerving to miss a zombie and dives out of the moving vehicle. 

However in a blind panic with blind faith his blindness causes him to not be in a great situation trying to amble his way through woods full of walkers! 

It doesn’t take long for Eugene and co to catch him up and Eugene points a gun at Gabriel’s head warning him to shut his damn mouth (rude!) and something about look where his big god is when he truly needs him.  Negan calls dibbs on ‘Gabby boy’ whacking him in the stomach with his dearly departed wife Lucille.

Meanwhile, Morgan has another moment, his imagination running wild sees the long haired dead savior (the annoying one who everyone was pleased to see eaten) that him and Rick left to be eaten alive (hooray!), who looks like a bottle of ketchup has exploded in his mouth and comically warns him it’s not going to happen.(His sense of humour has certainly picked up since he was ripped limb by limb!)

As Negan predicted the King finds the map and Rick does as Rick always does falls for it hook line and sinker! (Come on!) 

Whilst on route to ambush the Saviors, Jesus takes the opportunity to have a pep talk with Morgan telling him he can stop people without killing them (mindblowing information that only took 8 series to share!).  His proposal is simple; use the pointy end of his bō for the dead and the not so pointy end for the living and guess what things will get better (lets hope Morgan can remember which end is for what!). 

They then all are out in open countryside, which immediately screams danger and makes me dunk my hobknob a tad too viciously! - Damn you Rick Grimes! 

Back at Hilltop Glenns half-brother sees The Saviors on route and the community all go into evacuation mode.

Flick to Rick who is now being whistled at in that really annoying Savior sort of calling card whistle that puts your teeth on edge and makes you want to kill instantly.  Negan’s dulcet tones can then be heard from a loud hailer (handy!) but where is he and the whistling coming from?

As always unprepared Negan’s speech is always worth listening to as he starts by saying that he ambushed his ambush with an even bigger ambush!  (Already smiling....)  He tells everyone aiming it at Rick that some of old friends are with him and introduces Eugene who all made today possible and Dwight who in his opinion was gutless and nothing that sucks at life who now could watch them all die and have to live with it adding that Gabriel has to go too. 

Swapping his hoover for Lucille, Negan states he is cleaning house! (Can’t say I can visualise him in a pinny and feather duster! - or can I?)

Negan wraps up by telling Rick it never had to be a fight and he should have just accepted things as they were!

Eugene’s mullet moves in a nodding action and we the viewers wait in anticipation before we see them coming over the hill a line of Saviors all armed like a scene out of Braveheart minus the kilts.

Initially you’re not sure who is shooting who and then the penny drops as you realise when Negan’s hand has a bullet backfired into it that all the guns used by The Saviors have backfired injuring or killing them all - naughty mullethead Eugene!

Hilltop peeps with one noisy baby are escaping into the woods and just as The Saviors look like they are approaching they are enflamed in fire being bombed by the ocean people who have turned up prepared.

One of 'Negan' starts the surrender by getting on her knees expressing its over.  Meanwhile Rick red eyes sees Negan run to the tree with the pretty stained glass hanging on either side and takes a shot, but as always, he proves to be a shit shot and then runs straight at the tree ,as if he hasn’t considered that Negan would be hiding behind it successfully winding him with Lucille.   

Rick tells Negan he’s beat and that his people are down.  But once a maniac always a maniac and cocksure Negan reckons he will get out of it as he always does; he is bigger and badder than Rick and with a bat (you just cannot help but love that dirty rotten scoundrel!)

Rick asks for 10 secs for Karl which prompts Negan to start to count only briefly as he gets to 9 when Rick rudely interrupts saying Karl said doesn’t have to be fighting.  Negan gets to 8 before he throws his two-penny worth in to express he feels Rick was wrong.  Momentarily distracted from his counting down probably distracted by Ricks eyes and wondering if conjunctivitis is contagious, Rick lunges forward and slits Negan’s throat with a piece of broken glass from the pretty stained-glass tree décor.

Negan ever the showman attempts to have the last word and then falls to the ground dramatically holding onto this throat and considering all the blood on him and Ricks hands it’s a miracle when sweaty head Rick declares ‘Save Him’ and he is saved.  This decision was not before another shot of him and Karl on that road again!

Lemon sucking woman Maggie goes crazy refusing to listen and accept that after watching her beloved Glenn have his head literally bashed in by this leather jacket clad man, Rick is prepared to make such a decision.  In her ranting she states ‘it’s not over until he is dead’ (referring to Negan not Rick, although will this change?)as Michonne holds her back.

Rick chooses to ignore her and tells everyone to go home but warns that Negan is alive but his way of doing things is over and anyone who cannot live that way will pay the price. Then in his preachy banded legged way (boy does he needs some vitamin d and calcium in his diet!) he tells everyone that work begins and the new world begins! (yippee!)

Rosita asks Eugene what happened to the guns and in true Eugene styles he replies with some incoherent southern explanation which she ponders on and then punches him (something I have been longing to do for a very long time). 

However, she doesn’t punch him for his inarticulation but for his projectile garlic puke from a previous series.  Gone is the pussy Eugene who would have cried at such a response and he seems to take it in his stride confirming her actions were fair play!

Morgan disrobes all his protective bits of padding and gives them to Carol to pass onto Henry (I doubt the boy will appreciate these sweaty bloodstained what look like skating boarding safeguards all leading up to his exit from The Walking Dead into Fear the Walking Dead and hopefully to some better storylines). 

Rick is sitting under the tree, but not K I S S I N G, no he is crying probably got a random piece of glass up his bum!  Too many close ups of his inflammed eyes almost giving him a piggy eyed and very unattractive look.  

It is catching as he is now mumbling about have mercy prevailed over my wrath before sobbing, wheres the medic where you need them?

The Savior that has always tried really hard to be nice with everyone especially Maggie and yet everyone has been so mean to him decides to share with Maggie that the other prisoners are returning to The Sanctuary (it always sounds like a spa resort) and that he has decided to stay as he has been reading the book left by Georgie of the commonwealth (remember the woman who arrived out of nowhere with very clean and ironed clothes looking like she had just come straight out of a shopping channel rather than a soul who had suffered the fall outs of a  zombie apocalypse).

He tells Maggie he can make stuff (lets hope its more than a peg doll or a wooden spoon bug!). Maggie agrees with a simple OK without even questioning how and when had he had the time to read what looked like a handwritten copy of War & Peace.

Daryl who hasn’t had much to say so far in this finale gets to take Dwight into the woods (but not for a teddy bears picnic!).  Dwight says he knows why he is there and gets all emotional, but as he got to see Negan down that was enough for him!  Getting to his knees he says he is sorry and pleads with Daryl. 

Daryl, not one to mess with his words, tells him to shut up throwing him the keys to the van saying he should go and keep going and never show his face again otherwise he will kill him (I think he really means it this time)

It ends with Daryl advising him to find her (Denise his wife – not Daryl’s wife; Dwight’s wife who ran off many episodes ago). Dwight takes his advice and goes back to the house where he left a note for her many walkers ago.  It is still there but a weird sign has been added which indicates its either her or a bored walker with a biro.

Morgan, unrecognisable without his padding goes around to see the trashy queen who has stop wearing crazy outfits and instead looks pretty normal (whatever that looks like!) dressed in a decent pair of jeans and checked shirt (wonder if she has built a utility room off her studio flat?).

Morgan invites her round to Ricks place which she seems quite keen on and says she will get her things.  ‘Call me Anne’ (now that’s probably been the biggest surprise of this episode – who would have thought she would have been called Anne?). 

Morgan says he will stay and she must go, as he needs alone time.  So this is when he discovers the Tardis located underneath all the scrap metal that allows him to enter Fear the Walking Dead (Anne is going to be really pissed when she finds out!).

Back in Maggie’s den she is on the warpath and having  a moan to Jesus indicating that Rick and Michonne have made the wrong decision about Negan.  It appears that Jesus is on her side and Daryl who arrives out of the shadows feels the same way (he has never forgiven for Negan overdosing him on that catchy little number ‘Easy Street’).

Move over to Negan with nice little neck scarf pretending to be asleep handcuffed to the bed who when it is felt he is not playing ball, Michonne tries to strangle much to the shock of the doctor.  The message is loud and clear Negan is going to rot in a cell for the rest of his life and day by day he gets to watch them build a new world and see how wrong he was. 

Wonder if he will be in a cell with or without Lucille?

Gabriel manages to stumble upon the burnt-out church and thanks the lord given so much has happened and tells him he can see – see what?  See the light?  See how things spiraled out of control? See the state of the church?

We started with a flashback, so lets end this finale with a flashback and bring on little Karl once more with a Rick voiceover;

‘Dear Karl, l I forgot who I was you may be remember walking that day, walking side by side but bringing me somewhere Karl, showing me the new world you made it real,  I see it I remember – Dad' xx (I am assuming he would pop a couple of kisses at the end).

And so, until some time in Autumn we are left wondering about each of the characters and where Season 9 is going to take us; hopefully a few twists and turns and Rick will return to having gorgeous sparkling eyes without the redness – will Naughty Negan dig a tunnel with a teaspoon and escape? Will Maggie hook up with Lucille and give Negan a bashing in memory of Glenn? 

So many questions and only another six months to figure it all out!

Who has stolen the real Rick Grimes, and can they please return him, although I am fearful that it will be too late!

OMG, when I now watch The Walking Dead I actually feel like one of the zombies staggering slowly but steadily through each episode, never feeling as though anything is moving on – what has happened to the pace of this programme? 

What has happened to Michonne?  She has been transformed into a weepy emotional mess! And what was in her letter from Carl, I think he said some really bad shit to her and that why she is constantly reduced to tears.

I have only continued to watch it out of habit not excitement and it has been a long while since the edge of the sofa has been utilised!

With only two episodes remain before “The Walking Dead” wraps up the eighth season, so what’s happening and where are we up to?  Its now Season 8, Episode 14 'Still Gotta Mean Something'

Rick has become one of the worst characters on this show, a remorseless killer and a man whose word means nothing at all.  The Saviors let him and Morgan go after he gives his throaty ‘A man's word, that's still gotta mean something’ to his Savior captors ‘and then blow me down with a feather Rick goes and kills the men who have just saved him!  Ironically, he then asks Morgan why he saved his life years earlier???  An act associated with sociopaths and killers and certainly not heroes! 

What would Negan have done?

As much as Negan is a psychopath who has a really annoying whistle and humour blacker than a thousand midnights; "Eeny, meeny, miny, moe springs to mind that resulted in Glenn’s and Abraham’s heads being bashed in and mashed up.  There is this ongoing attempt to make the viewers feel that somewhere within this mentally unbalanced individual there is a caring side, a softer side by spoon feeding us that he called his barbed wired wrapped bat after his wife – REALLY?  Was his wife a husband beater?  Did she go around smashing people’s skulls in when she was alive?  Or was her personality just a bit spiky so here’s to the happy memories!  OMG! A rubbish bit of unsentimental information to inject into this tired set of storylines.

And how he had feelings for Carl "That kid was the future, blah, blah blah, before he quickly got in that it was Rick to blame for his son's death. See nice/nasty, positive/negative once a psychopath always a psychopath!

And what were the scenes with Trashy 'speak in tongues no longer' Queen Jadis and Nasty Negan? 

This is a woman who managed to stay alive when the shooting commenced courtesy of Simon (he doesn’t look like a Simon) who massacred everyone in junk town by running around a corner and playing dead? (note to self must remember technique!)  

What did this garbage gal do in these times of crisis?  She throws her companions corpses into a giant meat grinder (saw it coming a mile off!) .  Then takes Negan prisoner after kidnapping him and occasionally pistol whipping him in the face as she takes him back to her lonely landfill for what we hope is something pretty grusome.  

But shucks instead of having a cunning plan, she doesn’t, and instead ties him up not well enough (strange for someone who can make a giant industrial sized zombie grinder that she cannot do a good knot!) onto a small platform on wheels.  Big mistake debris dame!  Massive mistake!

Planning to torture him by first burning his precious Lucille, Negan the smooth talker tries to convince her it wasn’t him that gave Simon the nod to murder her people.   She then brings a captive walker into the scene (one she prepared earlier) to slowly devour him.  However, its never that easy and Negan manages to wiggle his way toward a gun that she just happened to leave nearby (honestly would you leave a gun within 500 miles let alone 5 feet away from this nutcase?) and he manages to fire a few at her. 

Being the ever kleptomaniac he is, he also grabs some photos of her nearest and dearest and uses them as a bargaining tool. 

STOP!  Hold on here; this is a woman who didn’t flinch when the whole of her village was gunned down and now she has cracked over a few polaroid’s? (Please! and not one of them of Rick Grimes naked!)

We see a helicopter zooms in overhead and then out of sight as she fails to flag it down or get noticed and then Negan drives away in a car? (conveniently parked and full of petrol), although as a parting shot he does offer her to come and join his gang, which was sweet under the circs! 

What is the significance in a world that runs out of tinned food of the mystery helicopters. Could it be a sign of a potentially more advanced, more meaningful life going on somewhere else?  

REWIND! It only turns out that the litter lady lives in a very minimalistic ultra-clean and modern pad, looking very similar to a display in Ikea.

At Hilltop, the excitement just never ends, and the search is on for Henry, who fled the community after accidentally letting a shed load of Savior prisoners go free. This whole storyline around Henry was a little weak and another example of ever-increasing, numbers of poor plot developments.  How is it that zombies cannot get past a few roots to have a little taster on this annoying and stupid child?

Carol then goes from being a caring individual into crazy Mum mode/child hater, so at least there is some consistency.  I suppose the stress and pressure of having to dodge zombies and stab multiple walkers must be exhausting and lead to her being mentally unbalanced.  Cookies, anyone?

Meanwhile Morgan plans to venture out, but not to look for Henry, oh no he is going to hunt down the Saviors who escaped and kill them. Several times he has a ‘Morgan Moment’ and shouts. “Everybody turns", one can only assume he was referring about zombification and turning to reflect his mantra that “I don’t die!”

He and Carol come across a walker that has been impaled with a bo staff identical to the one that Henry was carrying so things are looking up for this kid with the bowl haircut.  Carol insists that they go down the other road to find him, but Morgan decides he will press on in his search for the Saviors, convinced that Henry is already dead but guess what? Carol finds him just at the moment when zombies are about to get him whilst he was hiding in a place very similar to where Rick left her daughter many zombies ago only to never come back. There is a bit of head stabbing followed by a lot of hugging.

However not such warmth is shown for Rick and Morgan and the Saviors escapees who after they locate them initially are tied up by Jared (the ugly one with long dank hair) who thinks that maybe by bringing Rick back as fodder they might be let them be back into the fold of the Negan’s. 

However, this scenario doesn’t last long as they are rudely interrupted by the walking dead and with Morgan shouting to get them to come in their direction no wonder when Rick starts making promises if they are set free, this eventually happens. 

Unfortunately, a man no longer of his word, Rick and Morgan shoot all the prisoners and Morgan helps the zombies feast on Jared not flinching once!  

Its official Rick is as evil as Negan and with only two episodes to go – the big question is who will make it through to Season 9!

As there is always a huge wait in between seasons unless something stunning happens I think my journey with Rick who to me has always been perfect is well and truly over!  I see Fear of The Walking Dead is back on our screens soon and Morgan is moving over so maybe I will get once again to the edge of my seat - watch this space.....

Episode 6 of Season 8 The Walking Dead– The King, the Widow, and Rick’.In this slow-going journey as we make our way up to the conclusion, before it disappears off our screens for another six months, we barely moved forward!  It was slower than a sloth on sleeping tablets!

Whilst Jesus (not the original) distributed turnips to The Savior prisoners, who were sitting nicely in a line, I was positive only one prisoner refused this root vegetable offer (wise man!). 

Maggie (the Widow) shows up and has a go at Jesus, perturbed he is giving out their supplies willy nilly!  Her facial expressions are disturbing, ripe for the remote controls rewind and fast forward buttons, as its rather alarming! The days when Maggie’s face raised a smile are long gone!

Spontaneous intervention required, I found myself involved in a moment of audience participation! I screamed at the screen; 'What in heavens name, (sorry Jesus!) are they going to do with a turnip?’

With no knives or peelers and not a cooking utensil in sight!  Vexed, if I had a turnip under those circumstances, it would have been lobbed straight back at Jesus’s head!  In fact, in future we will no doubt see a revolt, turnips being used instead of guns to maim and leave more bodies to get devoured by the dead!

Is it possible to eat this solid root vegetable as if it were an apple without losing one’s front teeth?

I appreciate turnips are all year-round vegetables and come in lots of varieties, but these little Rutabagas are as edible as graphene being grub when raw!  Another thing without being too pedantic, they looked suspiciously like swede!  Don’t get me started!  But the same rule applies!  They do not constitute a snack!  When did someone last offer you a swede or turnip at elevenses–case rested!

Neck wound in!  I couldn’t help but be dismayed at the choice of fare on offer, albeit I fully appreciate their world has been taken over by the dead (zombies) and food is in short supply! 

Due to these important factors, they should have been grateful (and they were, apart from the man with dentures).  I too should have been grateful for the authenticity of such genuine attention to detail included within the script!  (But, am not!).

This episode lacked pace and too much déjà vu.  The only scene to cause me to sit up and pay attention came courtesy of Rosita and her trigger-happy demeanour.  A woman whose balls proved bigger than Negan's, as she brutally exterminates a Savior.  He will never whistle again! 

Sterling work by this ballsy chick whose good fortune found a rocket propelled grenade lying around! After the deed was done, the camera zoomed in on her face.  I half expected her to be blowing into the smoking missile, winking into the camera, both gestures welcomed by the flagging viewer!

As nothing much continued to happen, I researched the humble turnip dating back to its origins of 4000 years ago and discovered more to a turnip than just having a thrown in part on The Walking Dead!  

This is what I found…..

Things you can do with your turnip

Carve them into a turnip lantern, as part of a Celtic celebration and in return you are rewarded with apples (you can eat them) or herring, so for oily fish lovers, worth a night out and one to pop into your diary– around Halloween!

Enter a turnip shucking contest and be challenged against the clock to peel your root veggie with the speed of Rosita’s trigger finger - Very popular outside the UK - to be more specific–in America!  If any future visits planned, why not check out https://youtu.be/Zi89z59fhj4

Attend a turnip festival - Surprising how many you can find when you Google ‘where is my nearest turnip festive to attend’ Family fun, dancing, activities, fireworks and, no less than a turnip hunt to round off this memorable occasion!

Nearer to home or in your home you can…

Hours and turnips to spare? Why not make turnip jewellery and produce a variety of funky vegetable necklaces and bracelets!  For the more adventurous with oodles of patience why not start a trend and make your friends and colleagues envious with a nice pair of turnip earrings? 

Dabble in turnip art–you can cut out and use your turnip as stamps to print a variety of groovy designs - Christmas turnip wrapping paper is unique and I am sure much appreciated by the receiver!

Make temporary turnip friends–dress them up, name them and they will be around for a good few weeks before having to say goodbye!  A great stress buster–draw the face of someone you dislike, make no bones about telling them how you actually feel and then discard from your life forever!

The possibilities are endless!  And that’s without introducing them into your kitchen and diet.  On that note, here’s the positives to why we should eat them;

They are an excellent source of vitamin C, fibre, folate, manganese, pantothenic acid, and copper.  They are a superb source of thiamine, potassium, niacin, and magnesium.  In addition, they are a good source of vitamins B6 and E, and riboflavin.

But remember just peel them first!