TURTLE CRAP!
Week 3 in the Boardroom brought us Lord Sugar on fire with his Boom Boom puns in a task which results lacked the imagination needed to create an 'out there' toy suitable for 6-8 year olds enough to wow retailers and potentially become a valid proposition.
The unimaginative theme continued where it came to team names; Empower and Unison allowing Lord Sugar to compare them to a mobile charger and a team whose name meant agreement and yet couldn’t agree! Boom Boom x 2!
Pamela was the PM given her experience in pitching which proved to be better on paper than in reality.
Lewis was overlooked for the lead role and not chosen as Sub Team Leader getting his y fronts in a twist protesting the decision made by Pamela was sexist who was ignoring his obvious talents in marketing. But Pamela was having none of it where Lewis was concerned moving on, but not forgetting and subsequently calling Dean Lewis which went down like a lead balloon. Albeit I struggle to remember his name given he does so little!
Pamela explained her team had created a unicorn, a item 'bang on trend'so when thinking what they could link to it, they opted for slime another massive trend for the age group they were targeting.
Lord Sugar looked amused when examining the minusule pot of slime asking “What do you do with it?” Good question - probably not enough to even make a slime sandwich!
Ryan Mark voiced his observations of the unicorn as overrated and something which had been done time and time again which made Lord Sugar question if RM rated the product they had produced. In answer Ryan Mark diplomatically thought it was an attractive unicorn but felt it could have been a bit more imaginative. Intrigued by his outlook Lord Sugar wanted to know what an unattractive unicorn looked like to which Ryan said Lewis who had dressed up as a unicorn and played a key part in their promotional online video which didnt relate one bit to the product.
Their video was played and Ryan Mark who was the dastardly villain became distracted having a bit of a hot flush watching himself in his award winning performance.
At the end of this off the wall video Lord Sugar wanted to know if Alan Carr had been hired as Ryan Mark sounded just like him and likened his handling of the unicorn similar to that of a climate change protester being handled by the police.
Having explained the Slime Queen and her quest to save the unicorn from the villain Lord Sugar pondered on who the King of slime could be, coming up with Piers Morgan – Boom Boom!
Impressed with Iasha he commented her usefulness at the end of the pitch by bringing it altogether and explaining the outlandish plot to one set of retailers. Delighted Iasha admitted one of her skills was winging it.
Less impressed, Lord Sugar turned to Riyonn, the other teams PM wanting to know what and why their product was and how it had come about.
Tommy piped up with his vision of seeing it being a really good line which on hindsight if he was honest he should have kept his north and south shut until he had got a steer from Lord Sugar to how he felt about the product.
One of Lord Sugar's concerns was the age group the toy would appeal to. Thomas admitted that Scarlett had mentioned this previously but not in a way that alerted concern. Indignant Scarlett clarified she had voiced concern a number of times and Souleyman was quick to join in.
Riyonn reminded Souleyman that all his concerns were made after the toy arrived so felt there had been little point to comment after the turtle had slowly left its shell.
Thomas not one to be beaten down by the bleeding obvious, still blindfolded in the belief Tommy The Turtle was the best thing since The Ninja Turtles and at every opportunity wanted Lord Sugar to know its wasn’t just a toy, it was a friend! Be quiet Thomas as no one can see Lord Sugar strapping one to his wrist any time soon!
The video was played and Riyonn proudly watched only to look disappointed when Lord Sugar asked What’s had it got to do with the product?
He concluded as it being Turtle Crap - Boom Boom!
Down to orders taken and the results:
Team N/Empower
First Retailer – John Lewis bought 2000 units
Second Retailer felt confused, not enough slime and not original resulting in no orders
Team Unison
First Retailer – John Lewis felt the toy was too young for target market so no orders
Second Retailer liked the toy and would have it for pre school but given the target market no orders were made
THE TREAT
Toy shop bar for prize balloon modelling masterclass from Miss Balloonuniverse